Most Obnoxious Sports Traditions
By Adam Ruggiero
Love of Sports Correspondent
I came to a profound realization while watching the most amazing U.S. Open ever … even the greatest spectacle of sport – two contenders playing at the height of their already superhuman game – can be outshined by some wad who wants to siphon a vicarious thrill from the moment by shouting, “Get in the hole!”
Without fail, whether on the green or teeing off from 400 yards away, Tiger Woods’ golf swing is consistently punctuated with that asinine exclamation. What’s worse is that this nondescript voice cannot possibly belong to one person; it follows Woods not just from hole to hole, but from event to event – even across nations! This means that hipster-doofuses around the globe are carrying the torch of this obnoxious sports tradition.
But this is not the only act of human indignity that offends the senses in modern sports. There are celebratory rituals to be found in all sports that defy logic and common decency, and leave us wondering, what are they thinking?
So, here’s a list, by no means complete, of the most obnoxious traditions in sports – bizarre rites that make you want to cringe, run away and “Get in the hole!”
MOST OBNOXIOUS SPORTS TRADITIONS
8. John Sterling: “Yankees Win!”
Not long ago, the New York Yankees were the unanimous evil empire in pro sports, and fans across borders and backgrounds had no shortage of reasons to root against them. But while the Yanks are beginning to fade and other franchises are usurping their throne (ah-hem, Boston), the epitome of obnoxious Yankee homerism was then, as it is now, Yankee radio broadcaster John Sterling’s trademark victory cry: “Yankees win, tthhhhheeeeeee Yankees … WIN!” It’s as hard to type as it is to listen to. Sterling sounds spasmodic as he wails like a banshee into what must be the most miserable microphone on Earth. Your passion is admirable, John, but feel free to mix in some restraint.
7. Detroit Red Wings’ Octopi
Seriously, what the heck is this all about? I’m not going to harp on hometown traditions just because they’re weird. Heck, I think a little homemade flair gives sports towns character. Frankly though, I just don’t get this one. I mean, what does an octopus have to do with hockey? What does it have to do with Detroit for that matter? Ships are christened by smashing a bottle of champagne, museums and roads are opened with ribbon cuttings and Red Wings playoff games are trumpeted by splattering a dead cephalopod on the ice?! How do you even get a dead octopus into the arena? I get strip-searched and yelled at if I walk in with a water bottle, and somehow these weirdos can smuggle a slimy, eight-armed sea creature through the turnstiles at Joe Louis Arena?
6. “CHARGE!”
This one’s not all that bad, but what’s it for? “Dun-dun dun dun, dun-dun … Charge!” is as well-known throughout America as “We will rock you!” Yet, every time I go to a baseball game, it seems like a half-dozen fewer people take up the war cry than the last time I heard it. And really, who’s charging and why? In a stick-and-ball game where inches make the difference, and contests can stretch four hours like a well-played chess match, what does charging have to do with anything? This one probably won’t leave us, but maybe if we all agree not join in, it’ll pass.
5. Tomahawk Chop
As a lifelong Twins fan, I saw and heard enough of the Atlanta Brave tomahawk chop during the 1991 World Series to leave me with a healthy annoyance toward Braves fans. That, of course, and the fact that Atlanta has fielded one of the all-time greatest baseball legacies despite lackadaisical fan support. This ritual was even been taken up by the Florida State Seminoles, which suggests it provides some sort of solidarity between the team and its fans. I hope that’s the case, because it’s sure not intimidating for the other team, it’s just annoying for everybody watching on TV.
4. Sleeveless Shirts in NASCAR
I’m a NASCAR fan, and I know that most people don’t get it. “It’s just cars going in circles,” my friends tell me. Well, it’s an oval, actually. “Turn left and go fast,” they presume. Yeah, and draft, develop pit strategy and try not to lose control at 200 mph while going four-wide through a turn. All that said, there’s one stigma of NASCAR to which I can attest as true having been to my fair share of races: there’s a lot of mullets and sleeveless shirts going on. I’m not going to go into the mullet thing, since there’s already enough public satire for that one. But the sleeveless shirts have to go. I know you want everyone else to know who you root for by showing off your driver’s number tattooed along your arm and shoulder (in case they couldn’t tell by the cooler, shirt decal, baseball cap and bumper stickers that make you look as sponsored as the racecar itself). I know that, but you should’ve spent a little less time designing a No. 24 logo with flames coming off it and a little more time doing some curls or push-ups if you wanted us all to look at your guns. Until you tone up, and preferably tan those flabby, drywall-colored forelegs, please refrain from putting them in my visual field at the track.
3. Gooooaaaaaallllll!
OK, soccer – or futbol, or whatever, you’re the world’s most popular sport. If you really want us Americans to sign on so you can add to your already enormous base and whoop on us at your whim, please make the best part of your game – the scoring of goals – a little less obnoxious. For me, soccer goals are like four-leaf clovers and Sasquatch; I’ve heard many stories about them, and to see one would be a monumental event, but as far as I can tell they’re a myth. It makes sense that such rare, hard-won events merit a great deal of celebration, but even John Sterling thinks the goal calls on soccer broadcasts are over the top. Unless somebody bucks this trend and shows some class when someone scores – assuming they ever really do – I’m not going to watch a game, or match, or whatever.
2. Hats & Mint Juleps at the Kentucky Derby
What says I’m a snobby rich goonball more than a giant sun hat and a glass of sugar, alcohol and mint leaves mashed into a vile-tasting grog? Absolutely nothing! The Kentucky Derby is awesome, but the obligatory media coverage of the aristocratic elite engaging in their opulent social unpleasantries makes us real sports nuts want to gag. Please save these ostentatious displays for dinner parties and art showings and let us see some real fans with real drinks … like beer.
1. The Wave
Ah yes, the holy sacrament of sport ritual, the wave. People who get excited watching the wave come around the stadium toward their section probably still clap when they see fire or marvel at the miraculous wheel. Yes, when people stand in unison, a progression of adjacent groups do appear to create a large wave of hooting, whistling upraised arms clutching bratwursts. It’s quite cool. Well, at least that’s what I thought when I was seven. Now, I’m really not that thrilled about the whole ordeal. While it otherwise wouldn’t bother me, the fact that someone sitting directly next to, in front of, or behind me feels the need to throw themselves into it with all the clamor and uncoordinated physical exuberance they can muster has made me fear the wave. Still, I’d probably be sad if it went away. But because I know it never will, I think I’ll start sandbagging the seats around me in an effort to levy against the inevitable maelstrom.
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Comments
Tradi's on 06/17 at 09:16 PM
I’m a Yankee fan and I HATE STERLING. He provides no substance and while the victory bellow was fun for like, a season, it became old real fast. Saying it after a big playoff victory is one thing. Saying it after a 12-5, mid-May win against the Royals is quite another.
paulieknep on 06/18 at 04:11 AM
I couldn’t agree more Tradi. I too am a Yankee fan and I can’t stand listening to Sterling. Prior to 1996 he was arguably a decent announcer. Then the publicity around the YANKEES WIN call realy got to his head. He’s not a commentator, he simply rattles off terrible catchphrases like “Jeterian”, the “Giambino” and most annoying of all, “Its an A-Bomb for A-Rod”. He has become an embarrassment to his profession.
Conditional Love on 06/18 at 04:19 AM
I have to third this. Despise Sterling. Liked him in the mid-90s when his radio broadcasts put me to sleep. Too loud and cringe-inducing now. DO NOT WANT.
Matt on 06/18 at 07:48 AM
Very entertaining column marred only by your ignorance.
FSU invented the Tomahawk Chop and their fans brought it to Atlanta with Deion Sanders. It didn’t go the other way. It is agreeably lame at Turner Field but is very cool live and in person at an FSU football game.
Until 1967 the NHL only had six teams so there were only two rounds to the Stanley Cup Playoffs. A team needed eight wins to claim the Cup and the Wings fans decided to start worshiping the octopus with its eight legs symbolizing the eight wins to a championship. So, that is what the heck it is about.
And, yes, as a Sox fan I’d love to smack John Sterling at the end of a game, and often during them. He is similarly haughty throughout the game wondering how any team could ever be lucky enough to get a single Yankee’s batter out.
Great story and very funny but do some research next time.
MC Bob on 06/18 at 08:31 AM
I believe the octopus tradition originated from the fact that a team had to win 8 games to take home the Stanley Cup.
Win Stanley Cup: 8 games
Octopus: 8 legs
Still a stupid tradition? Yes
VonTrousers on 06/18 at 08:47 AM
The “chop” and war chant were fixtures at Florida State many, many years before there was even a TBS to broadcast the bad, baby-blue clad Braves.
Andrew on 06/18 at 09:01 AM
Count me as another Yankee fan who detests John Sterling. I don’t mind a short thing like that after the team wins, but it’s the rest of his annoying repertory that detracts from the enjoyment of listening to the Yankees on radio. Every big hit is augmented not by a description of the play itself that would fulfill his job description, but by childish wordplay that will inevitably be his “legacy” ("It’s a ribbie for Robbie!"/"The Giambino!").
In one recent game against Seattle he was too busy saying that “the Melkman delivers, it’s the Melky Way!” to notice that it was actually Jose Molina who got the big hit. It took Suzyn Waldman about ten seconds to wait for Sterling to finish and then correct him. Sterling was like a freight train that couldn’t stop his shtick even for the important task of accurately describing the game.
Ken on 06/18 at 09:41 AM
Most obnoxious blog tradtitions:
Ranking anything involving sports
Bob on 06/18 at 09:51 AM
As a long-time Braves fan I would like to personally thank the Yankees for taking John Sterling off our hands. He called the Braves back in the bad old days of the ‘80’s and he is not missed. Also, Braves fans, STOP doing the Chop.
Chris on 06/18 at 10:03 AM
BACK-TO-BACK, AND BELLY-TO-BELLY
Adam Ruggiero on 06/18 at 12:46 PM
Appreciate the comments and your readership.
Here’s my response to some of your takes and criticisms:
Matt & MC Bob - Good call. Not knowing the history of the octopus is on me, for sure. So I give you credit for bringing it up. That said, now that I know what it’s all about, I still think it belongs on the list of obnoxious traditions. I would argue that it goes without saying that most everyday sports fans, and even a good number of hockey fans outside of Detroit, aren’t familiar with the meaning of this ritual, and that’s what makes it obscure.
Bob & Matt on the Braves/Seminoles - I will throttle back my attack on the collegians for being die-hards. They had it first and it is college after all - it’s where love of sports still escapes financial gain.
As for Ken - If you don’t like ‘em, don’t read ‘em.
Marc on 06/18 at 01:20 PM
Wisconsin does a damn nice wave - regular, slow wave, fast wave, reverse, split, etc… Looks very cool when you’re plastered at Noon on Saturdays. But I do agree in theory, the wave blows.
tim on 06/18 at 03:18 PM
Ocotopus - i’m not a detroit red wings fan, but grew up in windsor ontario - right across the river from the “D.” The octopus symbolizes the 8 wins needed to win the Stanley Cup when the NHL only had 6 hockey teams.
Lewis in Sacramento on 06/19 at 04:46 AM
I hope this article was written tongue in cheek because if the author really has no idea about this tradition and he couldn’t spend 30 seconds googling it he is probably a big fan of mens figure skating. The octopus’s 8 legs symbolize the 8 wins needed to win the cup back in the 50’s and the first year it was tossed on the ice the wings won the cup. Don’t worry Adam, Men’s figure skating will dominate the Saturday Sports schedule from now until Fall so you have plenty of time to sit around sipping sparkling wine while eating your cheese!
Lewis in Sacramento on 06/19 at 04:48 AM
Cheers to this comment board and Adam for not doing the old “Moderator approved” comments bs.
I do agree with the Mint Juleps. Seeing Hollywood’s young and slutty starlets getting tanked on drinks that you know will have them hugging the porcelain god later is pretty stupid.
Brian on 06/19 at 04:49 AM
Braves invented the chop? Everyone knows FSU began that in the 80’s. It amazes me how anyone can write incoorect articles on the internet. My dog could write a more informative piece than this clown.
Old on 06/19 at 04:50 AM
Yeah, the octopus tradition is sooooo stupid. WHAT THE HECK DOES IT EVEN MEAN?!?!?!?!?
I think the previous comments clarify the significance of the octopi. You used to need 8 wins to hoist the cup; your standard octopus has 8 legs. I’m curious is Mr. Ruggiero has ANY sort of response. Furthermore, in an article titled “Most Obnoxious Sports Traditions”, what makes the octopus “obnoxious”? Two seafood-peddling guys thought the 8 legs was a clever - albeit a bit strange - analogy. The fans love it, it’s widely recognized and held synonymously with The Wings. What about it is obnoxious?
Lastly: as far as the sleeveless NASCAR fan goes, I have a theory. It’s kind of out there, but stick with me on this one.
A LARGE PART OF THE NASCAR SEASON TAKES PLACE DURING THE SUMMER AND IN WARMER CLIMATES. SOMETIMES, IT’S VERY EFFING HOT. PERHAPS THE SLEEVELESS TSHIRT IS WORN WITH THE INTENT TO KEEP THE WEARER AT A COOLER TEMPERATURE. I’m just guessing.
Tairy Green on 06/19 at 04:57 AM
By far, the most irritating tradition in sports history is Denver Broncos fans yelling “IN-COM-PLETE” after an incompletion by the visting team. Every one. Even if the other team is ahead by 8 touchdowns in the 4th quarter. Yes, I bet you are really rattling that quarterback you slack-jawed, buck (elway) toothed mouth breathers.
Trust me, once you become aware of it, it makes every Broncos home game unwatchable.
TheAngryAdmin on 06/19 at 04:57 AM
You don’t want to know where they hide that octopus.
Robert Schuman on 06/19 at 05:26 AM
This is the worst blog I’ve ever seen. The octopi is an easy one. The chop is an easy one. And then you diss charge, the wave, and sleeveless shirts? What do you expect people to do when they go to sporting events then?
Tar Heel Blue on 06/19 at 05:51 AM
You forgot all about the Cameron Crazies! Nothing is more obnoxious than the New Jersey Geeks painting themselves and their ugly girlfriends and handing out cheer sheets so they all know what to say to get their pasty white boys to play some basketball.
Darren Brant on 06/19 at 05:57 AM
Anything that Ken “Hawk” Harrelson says when announcing a White Sox game from striking someone out,"He gone,” to hitting a home run down 8 runs, “You can put it on boaaaaaaaaaaard, yes!” Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!
Tim on 06/19 at 05:58 AM
The first time the red wings fan through the octopus on the ice the red wings won 8 straight games to win the Stanley cup. I think its a cool tradition and if you want to make fun of traditions maybe you should look into them first, and then ask Nashville about throwing catfish onto the ice.
Spencer on 06/19 at 06:12 AM
If you’ve ever been to a Notre Dame home football game; you can come up with an 8 item list from that event alone. The 1812 Overture cheer, keys on third down, those bag pipes, the list goes on and on…
JAB on 06/19 at 06:29 AM
Adam Ruggiero, so what are fans suppose to do? And as far as most hockey fans outside of Detroit not knowing what it symbolizes, well then they are not a hockey fans. Everybody has something they don’t like, mine being ignorant sports columnist like yourself.
Joe on 06/19 at 06:32 AM
Hey Jaka##, as everyone has pointed out, the Braves Chop came from Florida State! If you knew anything about sports you would also know a former Brave that was a seminole brought it to Atlanta in the 90’s. Deion Sanders
John R on 06/19 at 06:46 AM
Tairy Green, I will second you on the Broncos fans In-com-plete cheer. I am a die-hard broncos fan and season ticket holder and am sick an tired of it. It was kind of cool the first year they did it when everyone sort of picked up on how the PA guy said it. Now 8 years later it is really annoying. The PA announcer retired after last season so hopefully that tradition will retire with him.
Oh and the wave is definately the most annoying tradition in sports, it is only done by bored, uninterested fans.
Jeff on 06/19 at 07:08 AM
THANK GOD someone else noticed the “Get in the Hole!” yell every damn time Tiger hit the ball. No matter what the shot, it was yelled every time. Next time I’m at a golf tournament and I hear someone yelling it, they’re getting my fist in their face.
Jay on 06/19 at 07:12 AM
I love people who just bash the traditions of other places, like the red wings. It used to take 8 games to win the cup! that’s it! the fact is that it’s unique, and I think most people just root for teams that don’t really have any kind of tradition, and must mock those that do. Oh and FSU was the first with the chop. Leave it to Atlanta to copy something like that like it was their own. That city has nothing unique in it.
NoleIn1 on 06/19 at 07:17 AM
FSU has been doing the War Chant since 1984. Deion brought it to Atlanta and the Chiefs adopted it after hearing Northwest Missouri State’s band, directed by 1969 FSU graduate Al Sergel, play it at halftime.
Mike Mamula on 06/19 at 07:31 AM
What about my donger?
John Sterling on 06/19 at 07:32 AM
I hate myself.
Your Mom on 06/19 at 07:33 AM
Quit your bitching you little whiner. Oh, I don’t like the Tomahawk Chop. Boo hoo, grow a pair and move on. It is an awesome tradition that all Braves fans can do, in rythmn I might add, let’s see your crappy, somewhat affeminate towel twirl. No one wants to see that unless an atttractive gymnast is doing it. You can suck my tomahawk, the chop is here to stay!
Joe Buck on 06/19 at 07:34 AM
I hate you too. And Philadelphia. And I have a mancrush on Troy Aikman. I’d like to take a bath with him in a hot tub full of Bud Light.
Buddy Ryan on 06/19 at 07:35 AM
I hate Mike Ditka’s mustache. And Matt Shuey. Mike Golic is OK in my book.
JD Drew on 06/19 at 07:36 AM
I hate the tradition on Philly fans throwing batteries at my head. NOT COOL guys!
Brian Dawkins on 06/19 at 07:38 AM
My least favortie tradition is skinny little WRs who make me hurt them. I’m a religious man, please stop coming across the middle already.
Terrell Owens on 06/19 at 07:40 AM
DAT’S MY QUARTERBACK!
Steve Kline on 06/19 at 07:57 AM
You forgot to add whiny sports columnists to the list. . .
GOOOOAAAAALLLLLLLLLL on 06/19 at 07:58 AM
Wow, your comments on soccer are incredibly misguided, ignorant, and nothing more than recycled Jim Romeisms. Do you have the attention span of a four year old? Watch one of the several great Euro 2008 games that have been on ESPN over the past two weeks and then see if you still have this clueless point of view…
Jeff on 06/19 at 08:03 AM
Really guy?? John Sterling is OBNOXIOUS. I’m guessing your a Red Sox fan, so is that why you elected NOT to include “Sweet Caroline” at Red Sox games. What DOES that have to do with baseball?
BHAUSGUY1 on 06/19 at 08:09 AM
Great article and frankly I couldn’t agree more about the list… I am from Boston (propah) (luv the sox) but hate the wave and that sweet caroline song… two fenway traditions that need to be eliminated.
Jack M. on 06/19 at 08:20 AM
How about the nearly 0-18 Dolphins,whose fans with the PA announcer,down 30 points,announce “That’s another Miami Dolphins FIRST DOWN”
Shlomo P. Barnoon on 06/19 at 08:22 AM
I can’t resist.... I once heard NASCAR fans defined by some pundit as “toothless, shirtless, foul-mouthed drunks and their husbands.”
Go Blue 4ever on 06/19 at 08:56 AM
What about OH-IO?
Jim on 06/19 at 09:36 AM
You do not have a clue! The octopus (having 8 legs) is a reference, having to win 8 games to win Lord Stanley’s Cup. This was back when the “Original Six” were playing for the cup. Anyone can bring an octopus into the Joe. You getting searched for a water bottle would lead us to believe you have a terrorist look ...
E Dulatt on 06/19 at 09:56 AM
Hey idiot, the tomahawk chop started at FSU (there mascot is an Indian tribe) and was taken by Atlanta when Deion Sanders played there (a former ‘Nole). What I find obnoxious is reporters who complain about things when they don’t really know the facts.
Rob on 06/19 at 10:09 AM
can poor bloggers be added to this list?
JT on 06/19 at 10:13 AM
Even as a lifelong Braves fan, I couldn’t agree more with #5. Deion’s gone already.
tampa81 on 06/19 at 10:30 AM
Your such an idiot, any semi knowledgeable sports fan would know that the chop came from the noles you stupid sob.
guy smiley on 06/19 at 10:59 AM
Don’t people usually research for their articles?if you don’t know what’s it about, google it, go on wikipedia.com, as if you can’t find something in like 2 seconds. lame article, probably knows someone at si.com that owed you a favour you loser, go to school, learn how to write an article
jt on 06/19 at 12:37 PM
ironic that tampa81 would say “your such an idiot”
ha, what a tool
Joe on 06/19 at 01:27 PM
What sports traditions are not stupid then if the Octi is? If other cities had traditions of winning then they would be able to understand Detroit’s and stop hating. Its a great tradition and its what makes good sports cities, not like we can bank on traditional stadiums anymore because they all have stupid names, how bout that for a list!
measure this on 06/19 at 02:52 PM
This whole article bordered on obnoxious. Hey, let’s rip on the first eight sports traditions I can think of, without thinking about it, and write a list as sarcastically as possible.
Lazy writing. Made me think that Adam never even bothered to find out about the Octopus Tradition. For a correspondent for The Love of Sports, you drank a little too much Hatorade in this piece, man!
David on 06/19 at 03:38 PM
WOW! I’m glad cnnsi decided to link this awful article. Nice waste of my time. DId you read any news article at all during the Stanley Cup Finals or were you in your cave watching Grey’s Anatomy? They constantly had articles talking about the octopi being thrown on the ice and what they represented. Great blog...absolutely freaking awesome, idiot.
Joel on 06/19 at 05:57 PM
“Unless somebody. . . shows some class when someone scores” ?!?!?!?!?!! You want them to be like a typical American announcer, half asleep, and say, “goal.” ? You’re an idiot.
Brendon on 06/19 at 06:08 PM
So, what is the significance of the Octopus?
Adam, totally agree that the wave may be the worst thing to ever happen at a sporting event.
Mathiaus on 06/19 at 09:21 PM
Adam, if you going to rag on someones hometown tradition, at least study its meaning FIRST. Research fella, mant traditions may be out dated, but they all started with reason.
Ryan on 06/19 at 10:33 PM
Two Words: DEEEEETROITTTT BASKETBALL
Most annoying thing BY FAR!!
Joe on 06/20 at 03:59 AM
Man all these commenters and no one can explain where the octopus came from that is wild. It was ok for guy number one to tell everyone where it came from but did the other 37 of you have to prove you know where it came from also. Number one on the list should be people getting defensive when someone makes fun of their team. Get over yourselves.
MadilynG on 06/22 at 01:32 PM
What the f*** is wrong with you people?! You’re all responding the exact same way. If you’re going to leave a comment, why not read the other ones first? And I don’t believe he’s saying that these traditions must stop or he’s going to go on a rampage and kill every one. He’s just pointing out some obnoxious traditions in the sports world. You don’t have to agree, but you don’t need to attack him and tell him he’s an idiot for not knowing about something with an octopus. Christ almighty, I’m with Joe on this one, get over yourselves!
JJ on 06/26 at 02:38 PM
it’s nice to see that as the popularity of this site grows, idiots have now flocked to our boards! guys, keep the bashing on the yahoo pages, this page, (until today) was for the educated sports fan.
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